Or not as the case may be....

Survived my R&R (Rest and Recuperation) in Austria skiing with my better half. Not so sure she did - it was her first time and she now looks like a multi-coloured jelly!

I got back from the 7 hour train ride - long but pleasant, these Europeans really know how to do public transport - to find that the car wouldn't start. shite. and then the taxi was 35 euro (£25). and i still haven't got the car back. It's ok though because it is in a pay and display car park and this is Germany, so their not efficient or anything.....

Luckily though I have got my dog back. He is a black lab cross. Crossed with what we're not sure, but after today's performance I would guess at black bear/Tasmanian devil and PCP/speed addict.... he is a 4 legged whirlwind that chases anything that moves (including cars) and tries to eat eveything that doesn't. I tried to stop him by feeding him chilli (well sweet chili sauce), but he just licked his lips and looked for more!!! The nause monster just drank half of my beer and i know he is going to ask for a "comfort break" at about 0330 this morning....

Domestic bliss is only available on TV. Unless it is a soap opera I found out today. After possibly a year away from UK TV I find that half of Chester is suicidal (Hollyoaks) and the other half want to be. Eastenders i cant do - all they do is work on the veg stand and drink in the Vic - the whole of Walford....great town. Coronation street - same crap, just up north. Emmerdale - unfeasibly attractive women slapped into an inbred village in the dales (PATSY KENSIT!!!! not to mention the others). I havent seen any Aussie soaps though.

Watched A1 racing today - like Formula 1, but one make of car, overtaking, action and excitement. so maybe not that much like F1 then...

Now watching the Forces equivalent of MTV, with "the Hits - 100 Greatest Videos ever". Up to No.24 and it is Beat it by Jacko....what could be next. I'll let you know. Unless I am back in Iraq and depressed again. HA HA HA

Oh and you all must read "The World According to Clarkson". Two words - FUNNY and RESPECT

Remain in Body Armour and Helmets....

.....until post attack teams have completed their search.

yup, we got rocketed the other day. It's always a nice feeling to be piloting a Jaguar E-Type around the Nurburgring (GT4 - PS2 - I wasn't asleep and dreaming) when CRUMP!!! the trailer shakes and suddenly you're scrabbling for you helmet and bodyarmour. They didnt follow up with more, but we sat around like lemons for a few hours waiting for the all clear. Safety first!

Apart from that, it has been pretty quiet. Still awaiting the election results (which may upset some people and thereby trigger some action) but all is running along smoothly.

I have in the past few days been reading Whickers War (funny) watching Terminator (old, but classic), Big Trouble (Get Shorty director, gangster-esque comedy. V Good), Cellular (Crap, but Kim Basinger scrubs up well) and King Kong (long. Very long). The local Iraqis certainly do have a good pipeline into the movie trade.

I am due R&R soon, which is of course very exciting and I shall be going skiing. I am looking for snowboards on ebay, nothing ridiculous, but could be my next failed hobby (following Parachuting, Scuba and Surfing).

Mort survived our parents, complete with Mort Jnr, although he did vomit on the Sofa and new carpet (Jnr, not Mort - I think he restrained himself). I now have to persuade my mother that its a good idea for my oversized hound to visit. He has paws like dinner plates and wont make a mess of the oatmeal carpet, honest....